Remember, remember

Posted by Orville Bennett on September 13, 2009
Read time: about 6 minutes

Sigh
It’s September again. School’s started. Unlike last Spring semester, where I had one class, was complaining about working and being a full time student, I now have two classes and am working while being a full time student. S’kinda neat. I should be finished w/ coursework in just a year, assuming I don’t fail miserably. Master’s research? I don’t really think so.

I also have 0 enthusiasm in my boosiasm for coursework, normal work, or even people-work (I don’t know either). I just feel … lost? The whole homeless and being “forced” to co-habitate with another human being thing got to me probably. I really am not suited for this whole socializing thing you peons do.

Oddly, I’m sure God has a plan in all this but I’m not sure I’m going to like it, or where it’s going. I’m fairly certain actually. But hey, wanna here a cool story? Pull up a chair suckers, you’re already here!

So rewind a year: it’s september. I’ve been ignoring my mail here in Ohio for months now, but I finally decide to go through it. One auspicious mail is from the IRS, I owe them money. Suckage. Whatever though, I have a job after all, and even though i can just barely make ends meet I figure I should go give these people their money. The sooner the better. The solution then is to arbitrarily choose a very large sum of money to give to them each month, without thought of my ability to sustain these payments in the event that something happens (colloquially referred to as <edited for content> happening)

Well here comes <edited for content> walking down the street. Happening along as the case may be. That requires more money to be spent. Oops. Or is it? I had decided earlier that since I was having trouble making ends meet that I should get a cheaper apartment. They call those studios here in Ohio. Now while I had decided that, I made absolutely no moves towards making this happen. Enter person X. Actually no, enter F (yes, F has been designated by single initials because on the internet, that’s what you do when you want to credit/refer to someone whilst keeping anonymity). F pokes and prods me to meet the Apt. manager one evening, setting in motion a series of events which leads to me getting my studio. Then <edited for content> happens. Ok we’re all caught up again. Let’s calls this point M1.

So it’s Late winterish and I’m sitting in lab and I say to myself, dude: you need a raise. Need being the operative word there. I text this to F. F says Yup. I go to the bossman requesting said raise. Let’s Say this is Februaryish. I later get back my tax refund. That’s in quotes because it means the IRS has taken the liberty of claiming it as their own. Excellent, significantly less high payments left to make. I can just about break even again. Let’s call this point M2.

Y’Know. You should go back to school says F.

I hate school. Maybe later. says I. Rinse, lather, repeat.

I really feel that this is what God wants for you, says F.

I really feel that if God wants me to go back to school he’ll let me know. says I.

How do you know he isn’t now? says F.

How do I know He is now? says I.

Why don’t you just try? says F.

Money. School is expensive. says I.

Let’s work out a plan. You can try, just try. says F.

Sure. If it’s not what God wants I don’t get in and I win. Booyah! says I.

You’ll get in. And do well. says F.

Uh huh. < insert sarcasm here >. says I.

This was two weeks before the deadline for grad school applications. I was accepted to the Master’s program, for the fall. On the day everything was due my dep’t was running paperwork, by hand, to be signed by department heads to get me in for the Spring semester. I forget the details. Regardless, I gave peeps chocolates. T’was well deserved. We shall call this M3.

Now Spring semester is upon me and I’ve gotta pay for all this somehow. Actually let’s rewind a bit: my raise is approved. After less than a year of employment I’d say that’s a pretty good deal. I can actually make ends meet (and not cry when I have to pay tithes). Let’s call that M4. I figure I might as well start saving now so off I go to the Credit union to open an account. Let’s call that M5.

So Spring semester is upon me and I’ve gotta pay for all this somehow. I figure it’s a good time to get a student loan. And it just so happens that if you’re a member of the credit union (the only one on school grounds) you can get grad student loans through them for pretty good rates. P.S. Wright-Patt Credit Union is awesome. Chase for reasons I will not get into, is not.

I’ve got to register for classes though, and so away I go. The bill seems a bit light though. $8. As it turns out the school pays for up 8 credits, which is exactly how much I’m taking, which is what I need to be full time, which is what I need to qualify for that loan. Did God really just work all that out so that I’m going back to school for free? Again. While getting paid, and having medical benefits and all that? I do believe so audience. But wait, there’s more. This would be M6 btw.

Spring semester ends and I get an ‘A’. M7.

Enter summer. Email comes through that because of state budget cuts no one’ll be getting raises this year. Except me. Since I already had mine. M8.

Lease is up and it’s time to move. Poor planning on my part, leads F and me into last minute apartment hunting mode. And so we get to the meat of the matter. I’ve found a place that I like and want to move into. Leases’re signed. Promises’re made. It’s July 31 and the place is not ready. All my stuff is moved out of my old place. July 31st is a Friday. From then until Monday I have no contact w/ the landlords. When I do, they prove to be rather unscrupulous and deceptive people. Such is life. So I won’t be moving to Village of Cedars. God has saved me from only He knows what. From my myopic view however, I’m out a place to live. Ah, but F to the rescue! M9, let’s say?

And now the hunt for apartments. Again. Quite by accident, or one might say, divine intervention my current place is found. Actually, let’s back up a bit. So F gets the apartment ball rolling and strikes a deal Wednesday afternoonish. The deal is: get deposit in by the end of day and the place is mine, apparently a few others were looking at the place. Unfortunately, the deposit is equal to the first month’s rent; which I no longer have. On a whim however, I decide to open a line of credit that morning at the credit union. The amount covers the deposit and payday, which is but two days away takes care of the rest. Well, now it doesn’t seem like much of a whim. God working in His mysterious ways again. I think I’ll call that M10.

But we’re not out of trouble yet. The other would-be landlords don’t want to give me my deposit back. They figure a college student’ll be easy pickings and not have the strength/time/money to go through the hassle of getting it back. And they’d be right. Except for M6. Remember the $8? That’s a student legal services fee. Lawyers for cheap = rent deposit returned.

Enter September. School’s back. Me and F? Relationships a bit … strained I suppose you could say. Let’s say that living with someone out of necessity is not something I do well. But I’m looking back, thinking back, about all the things which’ve happened. All things coincidences, seemingly random chain of events which link together. Milestones in my life I suppose you could call them. I prefer miracles though. Above I’ve given you 10 examples. Some things I’d prayed about, other I hadn’t prayed but all which needed to happen for other, necessary things to be set into motion. I look back on it in wonder and amazement. And just a little bit of fear. Ok, maybe more than a little. You know the saying To whom much is given, much is expected? It’s from the Bible actually, the book of Luke chapter 12 verse 48. To whom much is given describes me perfectly.

Do you ever get that feeling that God has a plan for you? I do. Scares the shit out of me. Know why? ‘Cause He does…